Alert the media......she's going camping

Yes, you heard that correctly, I am going camping this weekend. We are going out to our friends' property and hanging out at a music festival for the weekend. Sounds great, yeah? Except one small thing. I hate to camp. My hubby on the other hand LOVES to camp. How did we ever hook up? Opposites TOTALLY attract.

Anyway, this is my husbands idea of camping:


This is mineI've packed enough wine for a small community of alcoholics, so I should be OK. My hubby said this will be practice for the 2 days I will be tent camping for the Breast Cancer 3-Day. Ugggg don't remind me.

Catch ya on the flip side.

Meet My Guy

This guy has not had any blog time yet. This is my honey. He has been gone for five days fishing in a Marlin tournament and I missed him. Especially when there was a noise at night and I didn't have anyone to investigate the potential intruder alert. He kinda looks like a bad ass in this picture, but he is a giant softy bear. I guess this is what 5 days in a tuna tower does to a guy.

Lazy Sunday

It didn't rain. Our "Weatherman" can suck it. So I walked. It was one of those situations where it would be more of a hassle to cancel than to just show up (I was picking up some team girls and responsible for some other stuff). Anyhoo, the walk was great, but long...over 18 miles.

TheBESTpart of the walk was this:

Chicken Pesto Pizza and a Carlsbad Chronic Ale afterwards. We ate like lumberjacks with tapeworms. It was worth it. ALL WORTH IT.

So this morning I slept in. Oh My Dog. It was glorious. Mark is away on a fishing trip so I had the California King all to my self. Before I went to bed I changed the sheets into my new 740 count sheets, took a hot shower, shaved my legs and crawled into my oasis of luxury. I slept like a rock and had 3 really trippy dreams. The boys made bagels and cream cheese for breakfast. I got mine served in the to me in bed. For their thoughtfulness I treated them to a day at the movies. Of course we had to see their pick, but that was OK, because I napped through most of the movie anyway.

Lazy Sunday.......................

Paging the Rain Goddess

Please let it rain tomorrow. Please. Pretty please. Our underqualified, over hairsprayed 'meteorologist' on the local news says we are supposed to be getting a monster of a storm. I look outside and the sky is as blue as can be and not a cloud to be found. Please touch down here, please. The reason you ask I am pleading for rain??? Well, homegirl is slotted in to walk a 16 mile train walk tomorrow. This is where my walking team takes the train up the coast and we walk back to the train station. It's cool, we have fun, it's all good, except for the fact that walking tomorrow is the LAST thing I want to do. You see ever since I signed up to walk the 3-Day in November, walking is what I do EVERY weekend. I get up at the asscrack of dawn on Saturday mornings (now on Sundays too) and walk a minimum of 10 miles. I'm tired, I'm burned out. I have a laundry pile the size of Mount Crumpet staring me down. I have piles of magazines just begging me to read them. I have two dogs that desperately want me to give them a bath and take them for a cruise around the neighborhood. I have a pillow that really wants to spend some time with me sleeping in. Please let it rain. I promise I will have my good 3-Day motivation back next week. Please, I'm spent.

Number 9 Number 9 Number 9

Nine months

Prepare yourself, it's another Meme

Sorry, it's a slow Monday and I am in a bloggity slump. I bogart-ed this from my homie Alana

The phone rings. Who do you want it to be? My agency telling me they have my refferal and I can leave for China immediately

When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart? Yes always. I hate it when I see able bodied people just leave the cart in a parking spot. Lazy bastards. (exception: small children in the car ONLY). If I see an elderly person I always return their cart for them.

In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener? Talker, more like the village idiot

Do you take compliments well? I try. Cosmo Magazine says when someone compliments you to say Thank You, don't put yourself down, just say Thank You.

Do you play Sudoku? Sudoku hurts my Medulla Oblongata

If abandoned alone in the wilderness, would you survive? I would last one day, if that

Do you like nipple rings? Not on my nipples

Did you ever go to camp as a kid? I went to Rawhide Ranch, it was a horse ranch that I went to during the summers. Me and my best friends would go and ride horses and learn Gymkhana. My favorite part was working in the snack shack and making soda suicides. Good times.

What was your favorite game as a kid? The neighbor girls and I used to play Charlie's Angels. I always had to be Bosley because I was bossy

Could you date someone with different religious beliefs than you? Hells yes, but I draw the line at sacrificing animal religions.

Do you like to pursue or be pursued? I like a combo of both

Do any songs make you cry? If I really listen to the words to Twinkle Twinkle I will cry. I am a huge sap

Are you continuing your education? Yeah, I am getting a second round of 8th grade algebra

Do you know how to shoot a gun? Yes, my dad was in law enforcement and an avid hunter, so we always had guns in our house (Locked in a gun safe of course). He made my sister and I both take gun safety courses.

If your house was on fire, what would be the first thing you grab? Assuming my children and animals are out of the house, I would grab a Rubbermaid container of photos and albums.

Do you think more about the past, present or future? The future. I want to make sure my children have happy lives and I can retire and not be a greeter at Walmart in my 80's

Favorite children's book? The Giving Tree

What color are your eyes? Brownish-hazel

How tall are you? 5'5"

Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth? Many

Where was the furthest place you traveled today? RMS and the post office

Do you like mustard? Yes

Do you look like your mom or dad? My Mom

How long does it take you in the shower? 15 minutes

Can you do splits? God no, The V-JJ deservs better treatment than that

What movie do you want to see right now? Superbad, I heard it is hilarious

What did you do for New Year's? Being as though it is my birthday, I spent it with family

Do you think The Grudge was scary? The scariest. That kid is WAY too creepy.

Do you own a camera phone?Yes

Was your mom a cheerleader? My mom was a vollyball player in college, a kick ass one.

What's the last letter of your middle name? N

How many hours of sleep do you get a night? Anything less than 8 hours and I am Grumpy Greta

Do you like care bears? Maybe if I hung out at rave parties, I would

What do you buy at the movies? Popcorn, Milk Duds and a diet coke

Do you know how to play poker? I have played once and got bored

Do you wear your seatbelt?: Uh, yeah!?!? I happen to value my life

What do you wear to sleep? Boxers and a tank top in summer and jammie bottoms and a t-shirt in the winter

Is your tongue pierced? No and never will

Do you like Liver and Onion? Just reading that makes me want to hork

Are you in love? Of course, 16 years worth of lovin'

Do you like funny or serious people better? Funny. Serious people scare me.

Ever been to L.A.? Yes, last month.

Do you steal or pay for your music downloads? I plead the fifth

Are you a gullible person? Totally. My husband once told me that we needed to have our palm trees stretched so they would grow to be the tall ones and I needed to find a palm tree stretcher. I googled Palm Tree Stretchers. There is no such thing and palm trees don't need to be stretched. He got me.

Do you need a boyfriend/girlfriend to be happy? YES! My girlfrinds are too important to me

If you could have any job (assuming you have the skills) what would it be? A palm tree stretcher

Are you easy to get along with? I hope so

What is your favorite time of day? In the morning after I drop the boys off at school, I come home, the house is silent. I talk to the dogs while I get ready for work

Would you rather sleep alone or with someone? Someone

Would you give up the one you love/care for the most to become immortal? No way

What animal are you most like? A monkey. Why? I don't know

What kind of tea do you like the most? Passionfruit Iced Tea

Do you laugh at peoples' stupidity? Of course, I especially love when people trip.

Do you feel guilty for doing so after you're done laughing? Not unless they fall and hurt themselves, I will help them up make sure they are OK, and then laugh again. Falling is just funny to me. I have fallen and eaten shit more times then I can count. I would hope someone will laugh at me, it's funny.

Consider yourself tagged

The Perfect Sandiwich

A few have commented on my dream about the perfect sandwich and what that perfect sandwich is. Well I have many but my all time favorite sandwich is a crusty french baguette, one each side of the bread a nice thin layer of irish butter with ham (preferably Black Forest or sometimes prosciutto), a few thick slices of brie cheese and some watercress for some green. Oh, how I dream about this sandwich. I had this sandwich and a bottle of wine each day when I was visiting Paris. I think thats why I dream of it. I love Paris.

They just opened a french bakery down the street and they make a version of this sandwich, it is very good, not like the cafe's in Paris, but close. AND they make a mean Crouqe Madame too, another favorite.

So there you have it friends my perfect sandwich. Whats yours? Don't be afraid to leave a recipe because you know I will be making it.

Because I am a suck ass blogger, here is a meme

**I cannot comment on the events that have transpired regarding the building division, because if I do the vein in my forehead will explode and I will possibly stroke out**

Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line four, and write what it says. From Dead Men's Secrets
As says Howells: "If we look, first of all, for that part of the world which was the hothouse of the races, we can make only one choice. All the visible footsteps lead away from Asia."

Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can you touch? The power pack and cord to my laptop

What is the last thing you watched on TV? Dr. 90210 is on but I am typing this and not paying much attention

Without looking, guess what time it is. 9:02 pm, (wrong it was 9:03pm)

With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? This girl on Dr. 90210 talk about her vaginal rejuvination and brazillian butt augmentation surgeries. Also my hubby in the chair next to me snoring

When did you last step outside? About two hours ago.

What were you doing? Signing twin#1's nightly homework log for Spanish class. Watching the vaginal rejuvination procedure on Dr. 90210, uhhhhh...........EWWWWWWWW!!?!?!?

Before you started this survey, what did you look at? My neighbor Henry trying to get his garbage cans in his golf cart with his crutches (Henry is about 80 years old, has cancer and only has one leg, but every Wednesday he does the same thing with the trash cans, it takes him about 30 minutes and he won't let you help him, believe me we have tried. Henry rocks.)

Did you dream last night? Yes, about the perfect sandwich

When did you last laugh? Reading my son's comic strip for spanish class

What is on the walls of the room you are in? Paintings, wrought iron candle holders. My favorite vintage Our Lady of Guadalupe print.

Seen anything weird lately? Myself, today while getting accupuncture, seeing my body with all these needles sticking in me.

What do you think of this Meme? Mas a Menos

What is the last film you saw? Balls of Fury, not my pick but good for a chuckle and free air conditioning

If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you do with the money? Grease the palms of someone at the CC@A, so I can have my baby already.

Tell me something about you that I don’t know? I don't like yellow gold

If you could change one thing about the world, what would you do? Abolish hate.

Comment to President Bush. Does flipping him the bird count as a comment? See above.

Would you ever consider living abroad? Hells yes. Either Costa Rica, Australia or France.

What do you want to say to God when you get to heaven? Me? Heaven? Your funny.

Victory,...............I think.

We are back to living in Americas Finest City. The horrid heat has moved on and so have I. A promise has been made to my family that I will not be a raving bitch anymore or complain it is too hot, well for now at least.

Now on to the victory part. On Tuesday I got fed up, I mean FED UP that the building division STILL WAS PROCESSING OUR PLANS FOR THE 8TH WEEK! So, starting Tuesday morning I started calling, I called and tried to get in contact with the engineer who is in charge of our project, left a voicemail. A few hours later I left another one, no return call. The next day (Wed) I decided to bypass our engineer and go to said engineers supervisor. Called engineer supervisor once, left voicemail, called three more times that day, left voicemails, no returned call. Thursday, called 4 more times, left voicemail, each time I called I left the same message: My name, site address, plan check number and that I would call everyday every chance I could until I either got a return phone call and/or until someone approves our plans. Friday I forgot my cell home so I couldn't call and harass this guy. Well as luck would have it I get home and check my home phone answering machine and there was a message from the building division. The message goes like this:

"Hi, Mrs. M this is (whatever her name), from the building division regarding plan check number (blah, blah, blah), just wanted to....................."

The memory on my answering machine was full so it cut off right there. SHIT. So, I have no idea whether they are done or they have a question regading the plans. I won't know until Monday when I go down there, but something tells me they were sick of me calling so they pushed our plans out of there so I would stop riding their asses. Oh, hell yeah I am going down there, they obviously don't know how to return a frikking phone call. So that's why I think I am victorious, but not sure. I could sure use some good news for a change.

Some Comedy Relief

Two A-holes at an Adoption Agency

Day 2 of living in Death Valley

It got to 102 yesterday. I cried pretty much half of the day. I may be exaggerating just a little but I did throw myself a pity party at one point. We went to the movies and I couldn't concentrate on the movie because I was dreading for it to be over because I would have to go back in the heat. Why couldn't Balls of Fury (boy's pick) be 3 hours long? So what is a heated girl and her family to do when it is blazing hot outside? We go camp out at the SIL and BIL's house and sit in their pool for 5 hours. Being out in the heat for that long drinking beer made for a bad headache and a wonky tummy. I couldn't eat the ribs my BIL made so I walked home (they only live 2 houses away) and sat on the lawn in my bathing suit and chugged down a gallon of water at 9pm. Ahhhh, finally a little relief. Supposedly this heat wave is supposed to taper off this evening and today will be about 10 degrees cooler than yesterday. Oh, and the kicker of my day yesterday was when I decided to get some ice cream out of the freezer, it was soup. Yeah, our fridge decides to take a crap and everything in the fridge and freezer was spoiled. I am waiting for the refrigerator repairman as I type. I promise the next post won't be me whining, I pinky swear.

A little cheese with my whine?

Whine #1

It's flipping hot here. I don't fare well under these conditions. I am a huge weather wimp, cold weather included. I'm supposed to be living in "Americas Finest City". What the eff, man it's like "Americas Finest Furnace". Usually summer temps range in the high 70's to mid 80's, because of this fact our house does not have air conditioning, we have never really needed it and when it gets hot it usually only stays hot for a few days and then goes back to normal temps. Nope not this past week it's been in the high 90's. Yesterday it was almost 100. WHAT? Yes, I said 100 degrees. Thank dog we were at a pool all day yesterday at a b-day bbq, so I plunked my ass in the pool with a cocktail all day long. Don't even bother going to the beach because everyone and their brother (literally) are coming out of the woodwork and hitting the water. It reminds me of church (when I darkend THAT doorstep) at Christmas. I did break down and purchased a portable a/c unit that I can wheel from room to room, but someone peeing down your neck will offer more coolness that this hunk of uselessness. Guess whats being factored into the remodel budget as we speak? Yep, central a/c, baby!

Whine #2

Four days worth of referrals? Dag nabbit son of a monkey spank! Enough said.